Whether it be that kick-ass job you applied for that you not only wanted, but knew you’d do well, or the Tinder date that was totally your type on paper but ghosted you after two weeks of chatting, rejection is a hard pill to swallow.
Every single person has been rejected in some way or another. Even Donald Trump. Many, many times for Trump in fact. But it’s how you react to said rejection, which really indicates how the next chapter of your life will pan out.
My confidence has taken a battering over the years, from my dating life to my career. If you’re already having a tough day, for example, getting an email from a brand to say they’re not interested in working together can really knock you. But over the years, my skin has grown as thick as an elephant and I have some fail-safe ways of how to deal with rejection that I wanted to share with you today.
Dust Yourself Off
Whatever form rejection has come in, take some time to be kind to yourself. Give yourself 24 hours max to wallow in self-pity and then decided the very next day is a fresh start. OK, so if your long-term partner has left you for your best friend, you’re technically allowed more than a day to wallow, but anything else set a time limit and stick to it. Feeling sorry doesn’t change anything. In fact, wallowing only prolongs the feeling of rejection. Mentally decide that it’s the loss of whoever has rejected you and get right back on that metaphorical horse the next day.
Sometimes it is You
When it comes to rejection, most people will tell you, it wasn’t you. It wasn’t anything you did. But here’s some real talk. Sometimes, more often than not, it is you. You don’t have the qualities that the person rejecting you wanted. Can you help that? Absolutely not. You can’t change who you are, and why should you. You’re bloody fabulous. Just not a fabulous fit for that person. Like the old saying goes, you can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world and there will still be people who don’t like peaches.
What Lesson Can You Take Away?
The key to self-development here is to realise what lesson you can take away from the situation. OK, so you’ve been rejected from a job you really wanted. Why not drop the hiring manager an email and ask for feedback so you can make changes – especially if this is an industry you’re passionate about getting into. You might have needed skills in a certain area, but you won’t know if you don’t ask – that way you can book a course to develop your knowledge and in turn, have a better chance the next time you apply for a similar role.
Fuel Your Drive
Turn the negative feelings you have about your rejection into a positive by fuelling your drive to do better. Only recently I was rejected from a campaign with a big-name brand. I didn’t have enough followers on social media for them to be able to move forward. Did it hurt? Yes. But more because I know the people that read Apartment Number 4 and the community we have on social media trust the brands I choose to work with. Did I try desperately to grow my following overnight with bots? Nope. I turned to my current partnerships and looked at ways in which I could offer even more value to them as brands. I strengthened my relationships with the brands that do see value in Apartment Number 4, and in turn, I’m creating some great content for you, the readers. That big brand who wanted big numbers of Instagram? I hope they find what it is they’re looking for.
It’s Time for Something Bigger & Better
Now it’s time for the coaching session of the post. I’m a huge believer in the universe having a plan for you, so if you get rejected, please believe this wasn’t your time. That’s a very easy thing to say and not a very easy thing to hear when the feeling of “failure” has cut deep. But the reason you’re at this point is because something bigger and better is coming your way. Have you ever lost out on a house, only to find your actual dream house after? Or been turned down for a job, only to be accepted to an amazing position, way better than the former? It’s how the universe works. What is meant for you, won’t pass you by.
To finish I wanted to leave you with this quote that I love…
“There are no real successes without rejection. The more rejection you get, the better you are, the more you’ve learned, the closer you are to your outcome.” – Tony Robbins.