I’m about to step firmly into crazy cat lady territory with this next post, but you know what, I’m out and I’m proud. I am a little cray for Shirley Bassey and Audrey Hepburn, the two sister kittens I rescued three years ago, so when WHISKAS® got in touch to see if I wanted to put these two monster cats through Kitten Kollege, I could hardly refuse. While my friends are showing off pictures of cute babies, I’m sharing pictures of either pretty chairs or pretty cats.
Whether you’re a cat lover or not, I’m sure you’re all aware of WHISKAS® – they’re known not only for providing a healthy balanced diet from kitten food to treats, for over 80 years, but they continuously work with charities like the WWF and the Tigers Alive programme to help endangered species. And that’s why I bloody love them.
As cats grow from kittens to adults, WHISKAS® are constantly looking for ways to improve nutrition and care to help them lead a healthy and happy life. And as the most trusted UK brand for cat-related care, it strives to be the go-to source for all owners.
So today I’m sharing Shirley and Audrey’s first marks from Kitten Kollege, some better than others I might add. I’m not naming any names, but…Shirley isn’t the sharpest tool in the box. But first, here’s some cuteness overload from Kitten Kollege HQ – and if you don’t go awwwww then you’re dead inside.
Told you it was cute.
Now on to the part you fellow cat lovers have been wanting to read. My tongue in cheek approach to Kitten Kollege. First up we have…
Comments: Shirley undertook a gruelling Yoga class as part of her practical Physical Education exam. Her flexibility was fantastic, and she was able to balance and stay composed in even the most unladylike of poses.
Comments: Unfortunately, Audrey refused to partake in Yoga and do the Downward Dog as she said it was “offensive to cats” – instead merely stretching throughout the 3-minute test, whilst glaring at the examiner.
Comments: As a house-cat, Shirley can find her way around easily with little help with regards to navigation. She often finds herself in the master bedroom, when she tests her strength by opening a closed fire door. As Shirley knows she will get into trouble for being in this room, she’ll use her Geographical knowledge to hide somewhere safe and inaccessible – under the bed.
Comments: The more confident of the two house-cat sisters, Audrey enjoys nothing better than exploring the great outdoors – from the comfort of her armchair. With the wind in her fur, and the sun streaming on her back, Audrey is able to navigate to the best seating area to meow at flying birds, planes, cars, people, dogs, ladybugs…
Comments: Audrey has a fantastic range of tastes, and enjoys everything from WHISKAS® sachets and dry snacks, through to stolen smoked salmon pieces and the odd chicken tikka masala. She eats at a rate not visible to the human eye and is often found with her head in the bin looking for more. After receiving the news that she was still carrying a little holiday weight at the vets last month, Audrey has been keen to get back into shape. That shape being round.
Comments: Throughout the Home Economics exam, Shirley would run and hide when she heard the slight rustle of a WHISKAS® sachet being opened. She was also found in the sink on more than one occasion. Staring at the tap. Despite having a full water bowl on the floor. By the time she had removed herself from the sink, her sister Audrey had eaten both portions of food and was looking for more.
After School Club
Comments: Shirley is a fun, caring cat, and her playfulness comes in bursts at the end of the day. She can be found either chasing pen lids, lens caps or toy mice. She loves to be stroked and will purr instantly when she is reunited with her owner. Shirley is a pleasure to teach.
Comments: The older of the two, it is clear to see Audrey wears the trousers in this sister relationship. She is playful and energetic but will retreat when younger sibling Shirley is chasing her pen lid in circles for the 45th time. Audrey craves attention and was very vocal throughout each exam, opinionated and not afraid to meow until she gets her own way. Despite this, Audrey is also a pleasure to teach.
I hope you take this post in the light-hearted way it was meant. Both Audrey and Shirley knew it was jokes and weren’t offended by their marks or comments. And I know what you’re thinking, how can I tell these two apart? Here’s a secret…sometimes I can’t.
This post is a collaboration with WHISKAS®, but all thoughts are my own. Check out their website for more information on their cat food and their YouTube channel for fantastic Kitten Kollege videos. It’s worth watching for the cuteness overload alone.